How to Deal with Loneliness

It’s just me, myself and I…if that’s your thought process that may be the problem. I can remember reading Rick Warren’s book The Purpose Driven Life several years ago and the very first sentence hit me like a ton of bricks, “It’s not about you.”

Wow, talk about a reality check! Even as a Christian, I had succumb to the world’s teaching to look out for self. However, as Rick Warren so accurately states in his book, life is not about us, it’s about God and His purpose. He mentions, “focusing on ourselves will never reveal our life’s purpose.”

I learned a lot from that book, but I think the most important message I took away was the fact that we were not created to live our lives in isolation. We were created for community. Just because you’re single does not mean that you should live your life as a community of one.

Dealing with loneliness becomes much easier when you realize you are not alone. Not only has God given us His Spirit, but He has also given us a family. As Christians, we are all a part of the Body of Christ.

We are a part of God’s family. God has given every believer at least one spiritual gift to be used to build up the Body of Christ. If you are not using your gift to build up the body, then the body is lacking something it needs vitally…YOU!

Sure just as your physical body can survive without a finger or a toe, certain tasks would be easier if they existed and were in proper working order. Well the same is true with the Body of Christ, we need the gift that God has placed in you.


Don’t be selfish, share your gift!

Take the focus off of self and look to catch a glimpse of the needs around you. There is so much work to be done, but the good news is you don’t have to do it all, you can pick and choose. Conquer your loneliness and choose how you wish to apply your gift(s). You can volunteer, mentor, entertain, create a website, the list is endless. Start anywhere, but start now!

Suggestions for dealing with loneliness:

Turn Your Pity Party Into A Praise Party!
That’s right, one of the best ways to combat loneliness is to have your own personal praise party. Pull out or download your favorite Christian hits and praise your blues away. Praise & worship songs are my personal recommendation, but choose whatever appeals to you. The messages in these songs will help focus your mind appropriately (away from self and on Christ). Go ahead, get your praise on!

Count Your Blessings!
If you do not currently keep a journal, now is a good time to start. Rather than focus on the fact that you feel all alone, put some focused attention on all that God has blessed you with. I think Oprah called it a gratitude journal, but whatever you call it write down all that you have to be thankful for. There’s a good chance you won’t even remember why you were sad and lonely when you began.

No matter how bad you think your life is, know that there is always someone who would love to be in your shoes. Remember the story of the man who complained that he had no shoes until he met the man who had no feet. Think about it, you have so much to thank God for…and there is no better time to start than now.

Find Your Worth in the Word!
Sometimes the overwhelming fact of our singleness causes us to forget just how valuable we are to God and that He loves us. You are His workmanship, designed by the creator of all, for a great purpose. When you struggle to see all that God sees in you, join in the Free Online Women’s Bible Study to discover your true purpose and worth. You are a child of the King with so much to offer this world, discover it now!

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Helping Christian single women lead whole lives while preparing for marriage.